Lyric Harold The Barrel

News:

A well-known Bognor restaurant-owner disappeared
early this morning.
Last seen in a mouse-brown overcoat,
suitably camouflaged,
they saw him catch a train.

Man-in-the-street:

"Father of three its disgusting"
"Such a horrible thing to do"
Harold the Barrel cut off his toes and he served them all
for tea
"Can t go far", "He can t go far".
"Hasn t got a leg to stand on"
"He can t go far".

Man-on-the-spot:

I m standing in a doorway on the main square
tension is mounting
There s a restless crowd of angry people

Man-on-the-council:

"More than we ve ever seen.
- had to tighten up security"

Over to the scene at the town hall
The Lord Mayor s ready to speak

Lord Mayor:

"Man of suspicion, you can t last long, the British Public
is on our side"

British Public:

"Can t last long", "You can t last long".
"Said you couldn t trust him, his brother was just the same"
"You can t last long".

Harold:

If I was many miles from here,
I d be sailing in an open boat on the sea
Instead I m on this window ledge,
With the whole world below
Up at the window
Look at the window...

Mr.Plod:
"We can help you"

Plod s Chorus:
"We can help you"

Mr. Plod:
"We re all your friends, if you come on down
       and talk to us son"

Harold:
You must be joking
Take a running jump

The crowd was getting stronger and our Harold
getting weaker;
Forwards, backwards, swaying side to side
Fearing the very worst
They called his mother to the sight
Upon the ledge beside him
His mother made a last request.

67-yr-old Mrs Barrel:
"Come off the ledge if your father were alive he d be very,
very, very upset.
"Just can t jump, you just can t jump"
"Your shirt s all dirty, there s a man here from
the B.B.C."
"You just can t jump"

Mr. Plod:
"We can help you"

Plod s Chorus:
"We can help you"

Mr. Plod:
"We re all your friends, if you come on down
       and talk to us Harry"

Harold:
You must be joking.
Take a running jump......