Lyric Pretend friend

this is my pretend friend
treat him with kindness
take her wherever i go
just so there s someone i know

he s made of plastic
so she won t talk back
he is a good friend
because she s pretend
pretend

this is my pretend friend
she is my witness
he s filled her head the facts of my unspeakable acts
he ll talk for hours she never sours
he is a good friend she doesn t offend

o-offend doesn t offend
this is my pretend friend
she fakes it so well
i fuck him every night and brag about it
but then it s quite true that i don t like you

you are a good friend because you are pretend
pretend (x4)