Lyric Poisoning Pigeons In The Park

I d like to take you now on wings of song, as it were, and try and help you forget perhaps for a while your drab, wretched lives. Here s a song all about spring-time in general, and in particular, about one of the many delightful pastimes the coming of spring affords us all.

Spring is here, a-suh-puh-ring is here.
Life is skittles and life is beer.
I think the loveliest time of the year is the spring.
I do, don t you? Course you do.
But there s one thing that makes spring complete for me,
And makes ev ry Sunday a treat for me.

All the world seems in tune
On a spring afternoon,
When we re poisoning pigeons in the park.
Ev ry Sunday you ll see
My sweetheart and me,
As we poison the pigeons in the park.

When they see us coming, the birdies all try an hide,
But they still go for peanuts when coated with cyanide.
The sun s shining bright,
Ev rything seems all right,
When we re poisoning pigeons in the park.

Lalaalaalalaladoodiedieedoodoodoo

We ve gained notoriety,
And caused much anxiety
In the Audubon Society
With our games.
They call it impiety,
And lack of propriety,
And quite a variety
Of unpleasant names.
But it s not against any religion
To want to dispose of a pigeon.

So if Sunday you re free,
Why don t you come with me,
And we ll poison the pigeons in the park.
And maybe we ll do
In a squirrel or two,
While we re poisoning pigeons in the park.

We ll murder them all amid laughter and merriment.
Except for the few we take home to experiment.
My pulse will be quickenin
With each drop of strychnine
We feed to a pigeon.
It just takes a smidgin!
To poison a pigeon in the park.